Mindfulness, Wellness

The Emotional Trap of Perceptual Thoughts

Is it possible to think too much? The short answer is ABSOLUTELY. In fact, an average person has between 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts a day, out of which, 80% are often negative, and 95% are repetitive. But even if we are aware of our tendencies, changing our habits can be easier said than done. With the 24/7 access to the news at our fingertips it can be hard to be selective of the information we are being fed. Topping that with our daily stressors (work, school, parenting, etc.), and we can assure to have a whirlwind of emotions.

So, what can we do to help us cope with this excess of feelings?

First, we should acknowledge those them for what they are. We are human beings and those are natural processes we go through. But obsessing over a “what might happen” can paralyze us with fear. It will prevent us from living the life to the fullest and make us stuck in a seemingly safe situation. Awareness is integral to being able to break away from this vicious cycle. It allows us to recognize what is happening and lets us choose how to proceed. Afterall, fear is born not out of what will happen, but what we are expecting to happen.

Indeed, there will be some challenging situations over which we do not have control. But we always have a choice of how to respond to them. On the other hand, there will be some situations where we can manage what happens next. However, they usually take us outside of our comfort zone or require us to put extra effort, both of which can be difficult. But let’s face it, if we want things to change, we need to act accordingly. And instead of thinking of it as going outside of our comfort zone, we should focus on gradually expanding it. That will put things into a different perspective.

Taking action can be very empowering. It motivates us and helps us feel strong. But that doesn’t mean that the first step must be grandiose. It is ok to start small and build up the courage. We always have options; we just need to be ready to evaluate them. And if the simple thought of that stresses you out, take a deep breath and remember that happiness is waiting for you to claim it. You are not helpless; you just need to be open to seeing the opportunities in each situation.

When I am stuck in the perpetual though pattern, I hyper-focus on self-care to help me relax. Whether it is going for a walk, meditating, doing yoga, or simply unplugging to be present with my family, there is no right or wrong there. So, before you find yourself spiraling again, take some time to make a list of things you can do to help you relax and let go of what you cannot control.